I think about these things constantly. Though I suppose I am in a good position to apply to graduate school, there still involves some degree of risk. After reading The Fountainhead, I really applied Rand's philosophy. In most of life's crossroads, I believe, you can't really see what's going to happen in either direction, but you have to pick one, ultimately. I believe in sticking with that choice 100%, no regrets. Give it your whole heart, and let nothing dissuade you that it was the wrong decision.
I think it is an empowering perspective. So with graduate school, I just think it is a direction I have to actively make myself follow. It is a lot of work, its hard, its frustrating, I lost sleep this week, it doesn't sound like a good deal. But science is my life and I know that I can reap infinite reward from going to graduate school and being a scientist. I am motivated by that. i am motivated by my curiosity. But that doesn't mean I don't doubt the idea or that I weigh the situation heavily often, because I do. But I don't really like regret, I've had too much in my life.
No one should be able to criticize what you choose, even if its sticking around Sitka because you love it there just a little longer. Eventually, something will click. That's what happened with me. And ironically, it had to do with my feeling happy in Boston and establishing a rich life here. Weird that I would feel ready to potentially leave once I found a home. This is worth investigating.